Of course, everyone on the Internet took this in without even blinking, accepting that people are complex and varied in their desires and understanding that attraction is a complicated beast. To judge by the collective outrage over the episode, you would’ve thought that Dunham had murdered Ned Stark while dressed as Hitler and simultaneously shooting kittens out of a cannon that was also on fire.
(credit: Jaguar PS / Shutterstock.com)" src=" width="333" height="500" srcset=" sizes="(max-width: 333px) 100vw, 333px" / Now, late to the party as I may be, I have to say that this does bring up the ever-popular topic of whether it’s possible to date someone who is “out of your league”.
Either you get complacent because you assume that you’re so far out of your partner’s league that he or she would do anything to jeopardize the relationship – and thus quickly find out just how wrong you are – or you become so convinced that your partner is going to realize that they could do better and drop you like a bad habit that you end up subconsciously pushing them away.
How many women would understand that the vagaries of film production means that he’s going to be half-way around the world for months at a time, or that even if he was staying locally, he’d be too exhausted to do anything other than pass out on the couch?
The same thing applies to most models, pro athletes, and rock stars – it’s a rough, demanding life and it takes a very specific type of person to date someone whose career means that they may not be home for months or even .
And, importantly, he made women Small wonder that so many of his mistresses were also his models; he made them feel beautiful. Perhaps it’s the fact that you just after all, someone who looks amazing but doesn’t connect with you is going to leave you feeling cold and unappreciated.
Dancing is another talent that often overcomes looks. these are all incredibly attractive skills to have to be sure, but they’re hardly the end-all, be-all of attraction. Someone who makes you feel good, who is fun to be around, is going to be in demand as a lover, far more so than someone who is pretty, but distant and unapproachable. The nobody would never be able to keep up with him, relate to him, or otherwise be part of his life the way that Angelina (or Jennifer Anniston or any of his other exes) could. Brad Pitt is a working actor; this puts him in a see the months of living in the ass-end of nowhere when filming on location, spending time away from one’s family and friends, the 4 AM call times, the fourteen-to-twenty hour days, the mind numbing tedium between takes and the unending press junkets to promote the film after it’s finished.
After all, many of us know someone who punches above his or her weight class, dating people who they – by all rights – should have based on the flawed idea that the only thing that people value is looks.
Whenever we see someone who isn’t conventionally attractive dating somebody who is more attractive we often dismiss the relationship as somehow invalid; clearly he has money, or a high-status job or some other external quality that the more attractive partner desires enough that she is willing to put up with having to toss the cave troll a handy every now and then.It’s a self-reinforcing story; we don’t accept the idea that someone who looks like Lena Dunham could score with a guy who looks like Patrick Wilson because we never see it in the media.We never see it in the media because nobody accepts the idea that it could happen and so like an oroborous with an eating disorder, the cycle perpetuates itself.This is why celebrities tend to date other celebrities.Hell, this is why cops tend to date ER nurses; they exist in the same world, and understand the trials and tribulations that the job entails.It’s impossible – or so the assumptions go – that perhaps she’s legitimately attracted to him, that attractiveness and desire are about more than just the accepted definitions of good looks.